Reactive blaming kills relationships

We react with blame to triggers, to a word, a look, a feeling, and we react to reactions. We commonly think our reactions are just how we are. We may know that our reactions and blaming are powered from our past, but we probably don’t know how to deal with them, move thru and change them. Reactive blaming kills relationships by hurting others, causing rejections, dis-harmony, conflict, shame, guilt, and trauma—most of what is crazy in this world.

We react unconsciously from our past hurts; from our past rejections, dis-harmony, conflict, shame, guilt, and traumas. Unconscious means, we have not dealt with what causes our reactions and blaming. We probably don’t know we were hurt, that we buried hurtful emotions, that we made decisions about ourselves or who hurt us, and that we can awaken from it all and change things. On some level we know about all this, because we have a name for it—our baggage.

When we react, we want to be forgiven by those we hurt. We may try to make ammends to repair damages we cause, but the truth is we have no power over our blaming and reactions until we begin to learn to take responsibility for how we think, feel, and behave. We must learn to forgive ourselves too, and for this we must be willing to awaken.

The world we have all grown up in is hurtful, love only conditional, and most of what we learned not true. It is only when things don’t work, when we’re in a crisis, when we’re in great pain, do we ever examine how we are and who we have become. We can awaken and it is not difficult; it only takes motivation, an open mind, and awareness to observe what is true.